كاتب الموضوع :
لوشة العزاوي
المنتدى :
ENGLISH FORUM
hello
in the begining I'd like to say I really enjoyed the poem
the language was basically good the meaning and the visualization were great but the grammer is very very weak
begining with the title
it should have been (A night of love) instead of the night of love
because you are talking about a single night not the night in general
then you said the night I will kept
it should be (Iwill keep)
the moment he confession
should be (the moment he confessed)
His heart control his mind should be (controlled)
I throw myself should be (I threw)
mad of him should be (mad at him)
he whisper should be (whispered)
the last
you said I am the most happiness
it should be (I am the happiest)
the grammer is really important speciaally if you are describing something in the past and all those errors will just be a distraction to the reader and it won't make us enjoy the poem and it was a very nice poem that deserved to be enjoyed
in general I really liked your words
I wish you all the luck in the competition
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20-06-12, 06:38 PM
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